Season 1 house
Meet the dock
Six roommates who should not share a kitchen. Five Kearns siblings who own the name, run HQ, and can evict.
the fist
Vex
27 · Self-described entrepreneur
- Wants
- The booth, the house, the last word
- Fears
- Being ignored on a Saturday
“I didn’t come here to make friends. I came here to hydrate.”
the queen
Lina
26 · Runs the group chat like a state
- Wants
- Order, receipts, a decent night
- Fears
- Sharing anything labeled with her name
“If I bought it, it has a last name. Mine.”
the gym
Brick
28 · Macros first, apologies never
- Wants
- A scoop of whatever is nearest
- Fears
- A closed kitchen after 10
“The scoop is in. The past is closed.”
the dj
Nova
25 · Resident selector. Prints set lists.
- Wants
- Saturday, clean cables, silence before drop
- Fears
- Someone sleeping on the mixer
“He thinks BPM stands for Big Personality Moves.”
the roommate
Kit
24 · Just lives here. Witness for the defense.
- Wants
- To go to bed at a civilian hour
- Fears
- Being asked to pick a side
“I am Switzerland with a hoodie.”
the lease
Marlowe
54 · Landlord. Clipboard. Last nerve.
- Wants
- One quiet week and the deposit intact
- Fears
- Another vanilla-whey complaint
“The neighbors called. They always call.”
The family
The Kearns
Siblings. They take care of the house, the game shows, and the plot. Leon and Emilia run calls. Lilly, Liam, and Dexter work from HQ — notes, feeds, snacks — not the party floor.
head of house
Leon
20 · Copper red
Eldest. Chairs eviction. Runs HQ.
“This is still a home. Act like you pay rent.”
show runner
Emilia
18 · Strawberry blond
Game shows, plot, Saturday bookings.
“I can make you a star or a cautionary clip.”
rules board
Lilly
14 · Bright ginger
Posts house rules. Keeps the notes clean.
“I wrote it down. That means it happened.”
feeds
Liam
13 · Dark auburn
Cameras, wifi, the quiet tech in HQ.
“I can see the kitchen from here. Just saying.”
runner
Dexter
12 · Dirty blond
Snack inventory and clipboard intern.
“The island is empty. That’s my report.”